There are few things I enjoy more than drinking, smoking and gambling and, provided with the opportunity to do all three simultaneously, there is no situation in which you will see me as a happier man. Nottingham Racecourse was the venue of choice on Sunday and it’s safe to say we wasted no time in returning to the debauchery of our pre-pandemic lifestyles – we got a minibus into Nottingham at 10.30am and, before I’d even had chance to sit down and say hello to everyone, Brooks announced that he’d brought fifty cigarettes with him and already put £160 of bets on. I think what makes the races so special to me is that it provides me with the opportunity to do my favourite things, with my favourite people, watching my favourite sport and all whilst looking like a supermodel. Even the fact that the day ended with me almost being kicked out of the Slug & Lettuce for falling asleep and then spending £50 on an Uber home because Sam was pissing me off can’t take away the magic of the return of my favourite pastime. In fact, getting too drunk and arguing with Sam is arguably one of my favourite pastimes too. 

It seems like, since the lockdown was lifted on 12th April, I literally haven’t stopped either working or socialising, hence the criminal lack of updates from me. I’m obviously deeply apologetic for depriving you of my blogs, but it’s simply much too difficult to find the time to write when you’re as popular and in demand as one finds oneself. I already find myself nostalgic for lockdown and regretful that I didn’t take full advantage of the free time I was gifted, but I try not to be too hard on myself as it’s easy to look back and forget that the lack of normality was soul crushingly arduous and drained much of my motivation for pretty much everything. One thing I do miss, however, is cooking. There was a very reassuring and peaceful consistency to having the time and freedom to cook a proper meal every evening. Working until half past ten at the bookies is becoming more and more demoralising and a cup of soup or a pot noodle are absolutely no compensation for the meals I was able to cook when I had all the time in the world. 

Whilst on the subject of how bleak it is working at the bookies, I am strongly considering abandoning my decision to study a masters and reluctantly accepting the necessity of a full time job. My original justification for studying a masters was that I might as well whilst I have the time and the money, but it is becoming increasingly apparent I don’t have either of those things – the hours I have to work to maintain my standard of living mean that, if I were to study a masters, I’d either have to cut back on my spending and socialising (a thought so abhorrent it pains me to even consider it) or sacrifice the time I planned to put aside to study so I could work more hours (which makes the whole ordeal pointless anyway). The arguments against studying for a masters are stacking up at an alarming rate; it’s not apparent how it would help my job prospects, the extra tax I’d end up paying is eye watering, my social life would have to be hugely curtailed and the job I’m working to fund myself in the meantime makes me want to blow my brains out. I’ve also considered the fact that, if I did go and get a full time job, there would be nothing to stop me going back to University in a few years if I ended up hating my career trajectory. Who knows, I have a while before I need to make a final decision, but as much as I enjoy writing, maybe it’s finally time that I start taking life seriously. 

I did a social media detox the other week and I must say it has worked wonders. I hate to sound pretentious or cocksure (there are several jokes in there), but it demonstrated to me just how much time I was wasting scrolling endlessly through mounds of irrelevant tweets or TikToks. I resent those viral morons like Gary Vaynerchuk who try to convince you that every single minute of your day should be used productively towards becoming a self made entrepreneur or some bullshit like that, but at the same time my detox made me realise just how much time I was wasting. For example, rather than spending hours scrolling TikTok when I’m bored, I could use that time to read a book, do some writing or watch a movie – these things aren’t massively productive, granted, but they are certainly more fulfilling than the alternative. I also realised that I don’t need to let everyone know what I’m doing at every moment of the day and I don’t need to be constantly talking to my friends on Snapchat or the like – if you haven’t heard from me as much recently, it’s not because I hate you (unless you’re Chloe Deville, in which case it is), it’s simply because I’ve learned the value of having meaningful conversations with people when we both have the time rather than endless streams of fleeting and unnecessary interactions over social media. I know I sound like a massive prick, but it really is true and I urge you to try it for yourselves if you’re in a similar boat as I. 

I’ll try and write on here a bit more regularly now my life is pretty much back to normal but, in the meantime, rest assured that life is fantastic and it’s a pleasure to be enjoying it alongside you. Stay safe.